the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
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