scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize