Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
