'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
