Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I feel like death gave me a hand job
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
