the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
