How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I wish they made helmets for livers.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
