birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
