What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
