Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
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