the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
