Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
