Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
