one two three fourrrrnication!
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
