I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Randomize
