He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize