i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
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