Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize