dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
