Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Randomize
