If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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