So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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