We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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