I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
There r osticjed everywhere
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
