its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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