Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
