Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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