How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
