took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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