return my video game
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Randomize
