She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
