We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
Randomize
