btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
