I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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