I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
