NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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