the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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