So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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