Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize