We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Randomize