Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
