please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize