Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize