Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
