Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
