You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
he had hair everywhere except his balls
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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