The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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