I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Randomize
