there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
