Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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