I'm drive I can fine osifer
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
